Women, time to stand up for your own self

Every day, I read articles about cheating husbands, abusive boyfriends, men who mock and jeer at women they’re involved with. Every day, I hear women hating on men and complaining about the independence they have never gotten from their significant others. Every day, I listen to the same whining over and over and over again. And it got me thinking.

Have these women ever tried to save themselves?

Why must all women depend on men? What is with this norm in our society that has led all women, or most of them anyway, to believe they cannot possibly survive without a man in their life? Why can women not believe they alone are enough for themselves, that they can educate themselves, get a job, work, and support themselves? Why do these women want everything handed out to them on a silver platter? That if, God forbid, they are divorced or separated from the husbands and have children to support, they don’t need their ex-husband to support them; they can pretty much do it on their own by working. Why this dependency on men, why this belief that without a man, a woman is nothing?

I completely disagree with the concept that a women always needs a man in her life in order to live it happily. She can do it quite well on her own, she just needs to know that. Abusive and cheating men should be punished, and they should be bashed for treating women in demeaning ways. They should even be ostracised from the society. But, on the other hand, why should women wait for someone to save them? If they are in an abusive relationship, why can’t they be strong and get out of it, no matter how difficult it seems? It’s not easy to get out of a relationship, much less a marriage, but why not take some action to take control of one’s life instead of complaining to the whole world about how badly their husbands have treated them? Would the readers be able to save you? Would they be able to do anything except to pray for you? Would they be able to save you from the hurt and pain? No. Only you can help yourself. Only you can save your mind and soul.

The problem with our society is that a lot of mothers teach their daughters right from the beginning that they need a man, and encourage them to fantasize about marriage all the time, so they have absolutely no aim in life other than that. Then, when, in rare cases (which are increasingly becoming frequent), the marriage backfires with men cheating and abusing and beating and lying and betraying, they do not want to give up the marriage because they have been brought up to believe that the ending of a marriage is, in fact, the ending of a women’s life, socially, mentally, maybe even physically.  

There are several women who have been beaten with sticks and thrown acid on, and they still choose to stay with their husbands. When asked why, they say “The beating of a man is also a sign of his love. It’s when he stops beating me that I get worried." What can you say to someone who thinks like this? How can you possibly save someone who doesn't even want to save their own self? 

But on the other hand, those women also exist who have stood up for their own rights. Women who have been strong enough to separate or divorce themselves and their children from abusive husbands. Women who have been courageous enough to leave a husband who has cheated on them. Women who have stood up to men who have done nothing but insult them. Brave women. Valiant women. Fearless women.

It's high time us women started thinking about our own selves for once, instead of thinking about what the society thinks. It's about time for us to take some action, to take control of our own lives and to let no one dominate it. It's about time we stood up to men who have cheated on us and abused us, verbally and physically. It's about time we saved ourselves instead of waiting for a superhero. It's time.